The Help Desk

Party Etiquette

03/01/2020

Step aside, Emily Post. See ya later, Dear Abby. The VB Edit Help Desk is open—and we're taking your questions, with an assist from guest columnist, Man Repeller's Leandra Medine Cohen.

Help! I forgot to buy a hostess gift. Is it acceptable to regift? — Forgetful Fiona
Eh, depends on what you're regifting. I'd either recommend getting a bomb-ass dessert (Flour Shop cakes are my favorite party trick) or sending something after the fact.

Is it ever OK to refuse a host’s request to take off your shoes before coming in? — I-Need-the-Height Irene
I guess not, unless you have athlete's foot or something.

I prefer to make my own cocktails at a party. How can I do so without offending the host? — Top-Shelf Tatiana
Offer yourself up as impromptu bartender and make them for everyone.

Theme parties—lame or cool? — Daenerys86
Cool, especially when they're high-low, e.g. black-tie bowling.

I am [vegan/gluten-sensitive/allergic to _]. OK to bring my own food? — Don't-Call-Me-Picky Paola
Eat before you go! Or bring a big enough serving of whatever it is you can eat so that it's for everyone. This seems to solve the problem of what to bring the hostess as a gift, too.

I hate boring parties. What's the best way to liven one up? — Good-Time Ginny
Turn up the music, start a dance party, peer pressure the group into having another drink.

Is it ever appropriate to tell bad dancers, they're… bad? — Forever-Your-Girl Paula
I don't believe in bad dancers. The only kind of bad dancing is not putting yourself out there and shaking your sh*t all together.

What's a polite way to boot guests when you want the party to end? — Morning-Yoga Maria
Start lighting palo santo incense.

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